Can we talk about penises for a minute?

You know what really bothers me? I really don't like it when people describe a handjob as 'stripping' someone's cock in a fic. That just sounds painful.

And bloody.

And gross.

Also, the word cum? I can bite my tongue and almost peacefully deal with it as a noun since it's defined as a slang term for semen. However, it is impossible to cum, because nouns don't work that way. Don't verb nouns, guys. Just...don't. So if you absolutely must, then cover a character with cum, but make certain it's there because of someone coming.